The Dark Side of a Perfect World
by Dragonmaster Kurai
Summary: Will be taken down soon for desperate revamping!Warnings: Contains Self Harm. PG13 for safety. This is a one shot, tell me what you think, I love nothing more than a constructive review! R


Disclaimer: I do not own HP universe so get lost!

**The Dark side of a perfect world**

Hermione sat at her desk and stared down at her arm. It was quarter to eight at night as she sat pondering her actions. There was no need for her to do what she had done. As she stared down at her arm, she thought of her perfect world, the world that she lived in. She had parents who loved and supported her at every turn possible and her friends loved her… well mostly anyway. True, her grades had taken rather a large dip, but everything seemed so much more interesting than studying.

She knew that once she opened a book and sat down and worked that it was actually fun. But until that moment came…. There were a thousand and one distractions. She figured it was just a stage of teenagerism. So did the rest of the world. But this recent development in her character had her puzzled. She had read about this phenomenon often enough in those girlie teen magazine problems pages and had always held sympathy for those who took this course of action.

But that she herself did this… well that was more than a little strange. Hermione always thought that she had had her psyche cracked.

Meanwhile the blood from the various not overly big or deep cuts on her skin had stopped.

It was the first day of term. Nothing worth noting had happened on the train… Malfoy had been and gone leaving only his usual bastard remarks. Harry and Ron had been as goofy as ever, and Dumbledores speech as veiled as always. Hermione was not made head girl, which astounded most of the student body. She seemed a mixture of disappointed and relieved. But the staff were worried. They knew that Hermione could do much better if she actually worked again.

No one realised that she was as confused as she was. That she would change herself if she knew how to! That the flow of blood fascinated her! That she had realised that she could cut herself almost without pain and witness this! There was no rational explanation in Hermione's mind as to why she was doing this… she just did it. And then she would feel ashamed, ashamed at the thought that someone could find out. It was now something visible, not just her lips that she kept biting open purposely, or the nails she chewed. It had developed into a more sinister obsession.

Obsidian eyes watched her relentlessly at the breakfast table as she got given her time-table. Prof. Snape was also worried. He recognised himself in Hermione… and look where that path had led him.

He would not loose another to the Dark Lords clutches. Not her!

Hermione groaned. First lesson was double potions… with the Slytherins as usual.

"C'mon boys… maybe it wont be so bad this year…"

Hermione's voice trailed of and the three looked at each other. Then they burst out laughing.

Hermione's attention had drifted. She knew how to make this potion in her sleep. Or so she thought….

In the next instant a hand roughly grabbed her (sore) arm and pulled her away. That was when the cauldron went up in smoke.

"Miss Granger…" oh joy, thought Hermione, another lecture on improper conduct, failure to concentrate, bad work etc. . Frankly it all washed over Hermione without any effect. She would just nod in the appropriate places, and promise to try and do better. And she would mean it.

Or are you just kidding yourself Granger? she thought. Can I beat my inner Demons?

Then she realised that she had spaced out completely, and that Snape was watching her intently.

"Back amongst the conscious are we Miss Granger?" he asked her. She realised that he still had her arm in a vice like grip and that the wounds, particularly the new ones were opening up angain and bleeding through her robes. She had to get Snape to let go of her before he noticed anything…. To be discovered by Snape of all people… how shaming.

Attempting a weak smile she tried to carefully pull her arm free. She only succeeded in him tightening his grip. Her eyes watered unexpectedly and she stared at him in an almost pleading way. He released her.

"See me after class Miss Granger. Every one else pack up and and leave."

Hermione waited, feeling extremely ill at ease. Snape sat down at his desk and bade her come forward.

"Detention at 8 pm Miss Granger."

"Yes Sir"

"Miss Granger I must ask… is there anything bothering you?"

Except for the cuts on my arm you re-opened you bastard

"Nothing Sir"

He gazed at her thoughtfully.

"Until this evening then Miss Granger."

Hermione flew from the room. Absentmindedly Snape looked at his hand. It was red with blood. Grabbing some parchment Snape hastily penned a note to his next class (the fifth) and followed her. On his brisk walk through the castle allowed himself some time to think. What was wrong with the prize student? Had she been raped? No, he felt sure she hadn't.. she didn't display any signs… and heavens knew, he knew what he was looking for. He resolved to find out… he could not let another student take the path of misery and darkness… his very own path.

His trail led him to an almost unused corner of the castle. There he saw a figure huddled in the corner. Silently he walked over and regarede the scene before him. Hermione's arm was like a battlefield. It was a maze of scabs, fresh wounds, and almost healed ones. He then saw the telltale pencil-sharpener blade. Gently he reached down and pulled it from her grasp. Hermione started. She had not heard him.

" Give it back!" she seethed.

"No Miss Granger I will not!"

The blade vanished. Hermione growled with fury, and threw herself at Snape, punching and scratching him for all she was worth. She did not however, get very far, as Snape calmly caught her wrists and let her fury dissipate into sadness. Her violent shakes of anger dissipated even further into sobs of grief. Snape drew her gently to him, encircling her with his arms. She did not flinch away, but buried her face in his chest and he carefully rocked her against him. They sank to the floor, a tangled mass of limbs.

As her sobs began to lessen, he realized that Hermione had cried herself to sleep against him. Inwardly he smiled. The exhaustion was plain to see on her face, as he gently picked her up, and proceeded to carry her down to the dungeons. Let her rest the night… tomorrow would bring them one step closer to solving Hermione's problems!

AN: so… what do ya think? Inspired by me, and my life! Plz leave a review. If you SI (self-injure) get help! You need it… trust me on that! Have a nice day (and R-E-V-I-E-W)!!!!


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